Speaking Their minds
by Heir Guardian
Summary: The cards are kinda fed up....
1. Sweet dreams Yami...

Speaking Their Mind.  
  
Yugi lay in bed sound asleep, and content. If he had been awake he would have noticed that his deck seemed to be glowing, well, not actually his deck, but one particular card.  
  
The Dark Magician popped out of the deck and glared at the sleeping form. His eyes softened slightly when he realized it was Yugi and then he glared some more and tapped at the puzzle that Yugi clutched in his sleep. He heard a bemused grumbling and tapped at it again.  
  
This time he was sure he heard a snore. Tapping his foot impatiently, he whacked the puzzle with his staff, narrowly missing the sleeping Yugi, and had the satisfaction of hearing a growl. Yugi's form shifted and in bed there was now a slightly taller youth with four golden spikes going through the already spiked up mess he called hair.  
  
He glared at his surroundings and then saw the Dark Magician and his eyes widen. He opened his mouth to speak but was hit with the staff.  
  
"Don't talk!" Yami glared at him but stayed silent. "I have a bone to pick with you. Everyone knows I'm your favourite card right?" Yami nodded. "Well than, why do you use me as bait!?" Yami stared at him not understanding.  
  
"Fine, let me put it this way and maybe you will understand." He took a deep breath, "Everyone knows I'm your favourite card and therefore when you put me into play I become a target and you use me to your advantage. I mean, I am the most powerful spellcaster and yet you treat me like a pathetic trap card!"  
  
Yami again tried to speak and tell him trap cards were not pathetic, but he got hit yet again. He was starting to see little sphinxes going around his head.  
  
"I'm not done! I also want to ask why you don't refer to me as something special, just you're favourite. You make it sound like I'm just a lap dog. I mean, when you summon the Dragon Champion Gaia, you make him sound all special, when it's actually two cards. Two!! I'm only one and still kick more ass than they do!"  
  
Yami wisely refrained from speaking although he was sorely tempted to tell him that he didn't kick anything, just uses magic.  
  
"Furthermore, with those magical hats of yours and that box thingy, you make it seem like all I can do is cheap tricks. I'm powerful and I'm fed up with the other cards looking at me like I have a little golden collar on me!!"  
  
He whacked Yami again, quite hard and than disappeared into the deck. Yami held his smarting head and glared at the cards.  
  
"Fine! Next time I put you into play I'm going to make sure you're the one that gets hit." He thought for a minute. "Maybe Joey wants a Dark Magician." Just as he was grinning he got hit again, only this time a loud clang was heard. He turned and saw the Celtic Guardian with a sword raised above his head.  
  
"Master." he spoke quietly. "We need to talk.." Yami gulped as the sword was brought under his chin. "I seem to have this understanding that you never let me have any fun in fights. Every time I'm brought into play I either die immediately or I get one lousy hit and then I'm destroyed. It's no fair and as an elf, my pride demands that I should fight.."  
  
Yami groaned, would he ever get any sleep. Another whack on the head with a sword told him no and deep inside him in his soul room, Yugi rested peacefully. 


	2. Kaiba's turn...

Kaiba's Turn.  
  
My notes: I got such great reviews on the first part I might as well continue.I'm thinking of doing a variety of characters..hmm..oh and I don't think Yami would actually give away the Dark Magician so the cards wouldn't have to hurt him and now I have an idea for another story...sigh.I don't get a break.  
  
It was late at night and all was calm except in one room. A light was on and no one was quite sure why. Including the one who had turned it on.  
  
Kaiba stood their staring at his computer screen and wondered what had woken him up. He had just gotten up and had come down to his Lab and sat their staring at the screen and his dueling deck that lay in front of it.  
  
He was about to go back to his room and chalk the whole thing up to working to hard when he saw something flicker into life on the screen. He stared. It was his prized Dragons, all three of them! They turned and stared at Kaiba and as one they emerged from the screen.  
  
Kaiba had backed away in a panic and was flush against one wall with his dragons glaring at him.  
  
"Kaiba.our Lord and Master." One spoke to him and it seemed their was a touch of anger in the tone. He was about to speak when the second one flicked its tail and caused a laptop to fall on his head. He wondered why he saw little fairies flying around his head.  
  
"Don't speak! This is our time!" said the first one.  
  
"We understand that we are your favourite cards and that you worship us.but you, you, don't take care of us!!" Kaiba blinked. Did the third one actually whine? He was about to speak again when the other dragon used the same abusive tail and flicked the top of his head.  
  
"We already told you. We're speaking right now! So listen!" Kaiba's head told him to follow the advice, so did the walls of his lab which were getting ruined by agitated tails.  
  
"You have always used us for power and it took you forever to trust in us. You have let us become captured and used against you, our chosen master and worst of all." All three dragons breathed deeply and then yelled at him, the power of their voice slamming him farther into the battered wall and bruising his back.  
  
"You destroyed our brother!! You monster! He could have joined us, we could have been a family but noooo." All glared at him and Kaiba had the distinct feeling he should be running. He followed his own advice and ran out of the lab, not realizing the dragon's were laughing at him now as well as being pissed off. They had gotten their revenge.  
  
The next morning Mokuba woke up to a most unusual sight. His big brother was painting all the statues of his beloved dragons pink and muttering.  
  
"Let's see them disturb my sleep now.." Mokuba also wondered why he was wrapping all the mouths in duct tape..?  
  
My end notes: I know short, but they are just spurts of humor nothing important. Hope people like. Bye!! 


	3. So much for cute!

So Much for Cute..  
  
My notes: Next in this weird series..  
  
Tea stared down at her notebook. She was bored with doing history, after everything she had been through with Yugi, she felt like she was a part of it.  
  
'Why does the Teacher have to keep talking, it's driving me insane!!'  
  
She picked up her pencil and started sketching in her notebook. She noticed it was one of her most used cards, Shining Friendship, or as she always thought, petite angel with really huge wings.  
  
She giggled slightly at that thought and the teacher turned and glared at her. She covered her mouth and looked back down at her picture and was glad her mouth was covered by her hands.  
  
She gasped. Her picture looked like the actual card and it was glaring at her. It pointed to the clear lined part of her notebook and she looked.  
  
-Stop staring! It's rude and besides. We need to talk.-  
  
If Tea had talked with either Yami or Seto she would have started to worry. As it was she was slightly annoyed at the tone that was implied with the short sentence.  
  
"Hey, you little-"  
  
"Tea!"  
  
She forgot about the teacher and blushed when she got yelled at. She stared back down at the paper.  
  
-Serves you right. Maybe if you actually pay attention you might learn something, not like your dueling skills.-  
  
"How dare you!?"  
  
"Tea!"  
  
She dropped farther into her seat and saw that the card was smirking.  
  
-Face it girl, you can't duel. I mean, the only reason you won against Mai was because she let you.-  
  
Tea remembered where she was and wrote down her response on the paper instead of saying it.  
  
'It was my belief in my friends that won.'  
  
-No. It was pity, not like when you first started dueling Joey. Talk about a pity case.-  
  
Tea was confused for a moment when the card caught on fire, but quickly recovered.  
  
"HAH!"  
  
"TEA!!"  
  
She didn't realize she had risen and sat back down amongst the laughter of other students.  
  
'At least you can't do anything, your only one. Besides you would need a magician to create more, cause I am not drawing more.'  
  
The picture stared at her evilly.  
  
-We have a magician.- The Magician of Faith appeared and used some sort of spell to call forth tons of Petite Angels.  
  
She stared in horror as they milled about on the page, criticizing her.  
  
-Horrid duelist-  
  
"Watch it!"  
  
"TEA!!!"  
  
-No backbone-  
  
"I have Friendship!"  
  
"TEA!!!!"  
  
-yeah Friendship that you can't even use.-  
  
"NOT THE CARD YOU FLYING PUFFBALL!! REAL FRIENDS!!"  
  
"TEA!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
Tea had had enough. She picked up her whole notebook and tore it in two.  
  
"You're only paper."  
  
And with the teacher still yelling at her, she walked out of the class.  
  
The pictures on the paper congratulated themselves and the Magician.  
  
-At least now she has strength as well as Faith, not that it wasn't fun though.-  
  
The Magician of Faith used her magic to get rid of all the pictures on the paper and left the teacher stumped as to what got Tea so angry.  
  
My notes: Never trust small little angels, they're sneaky. Besides I couldn't think of any way for them to beat up on her, so they got someone else. Next is Mai, but it's not the card that everyone thinks.. 


	4. But I Thought...

But I Thought.  
  
My notes: Next in the series, poor Mai, I love all the reviews and this is such wonderful stress relief.ahhhh..  
  
Mai sat there in her newest acquirement. A pool! Who says Duels can't get you anything. She was shuffling her cards when one slipped from her fingers.  
  
It landed in the water and she cried out, but the next thing she knew the card had appeared.  
  
Harpy's Pet Dragon!  
  
"Pet Dragon?" she whispered.  
  
The dragon heard her and swung it's head around to stare at her and she didn't like the look in it's eyes.  
  
"Yes it is me, but we need to talk, and discuss this 'Pet' issue."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Face it Lady, if you were as powerful as me would you like others to know that a little flying girl had you on a leash?"  
  
"But you're her pet?"  
  
"I'm nobody's PET!! I just lost a stupid bet and now I'm stuck with a collar on and you."  
  
He glared and pointed a claw at her, ".have to announce to the world that I'm a pet."  
  
The dragon seemed to be trying to control it's rage but that didn't stop it from lashing out at her pool, it's claws destroying the tiles on one side.  
  
She watched in stunned horror as tiles of her beautiful pool floated across it's surface. But she didn't dare talk back to the enraged Dragon. Not with those claws.  
  
"What's worse is that you add injury to insult by bringing out more of them and handing them each a chain!"  
  
"But they give you power?"  
  
"Yeah, to tease me, never letting me go back to my full strength unless I give into them!!"  
  
More claws destroyed the other side of her pool and she watched as the whole thing collapsed upon itself, leaving her with nothing but a now ruined backyard.  
  
"What is it with women and chains!!!"  
  
With that the Dragon returned to the card, leaving it up to Mai how to explain to the person that owned the pool what happened to it. Now she would have to, to, to PAY for it.  
  
"You blasted Dragon!! You know how much money you just cost me!! I'm going to make sure that every Harpy in my Deck is in play next time I put you into play. You'll be so bogged down by chains you won't be able to get up!!"  
  
This was how Seto came back to find Mai and the pool she had won from him for the day. He wisely turned around and walked back into his mansion. He'd get the money later. He also gave a glare over at the statues around his house, which seemed to smirk.  
  
My notes: Well.what did you think? I needed something different then bashing her over the head and I knew that a loss in money and a card going after her would be enough to get her upset. Does anyone still like this, ummmm, series I guess I could call it? Nahh.still just stress relief. Next is..Yami Bakura!! Try and figure that one out. I have it written but we will see if anyone can figure out basically what I'm doing. The first one who does can ask for a request.no sex, besides that, anything else. 


	5. Change? Check! Heart? Ummm....

Change? Check! Heart? Ummm.  
  
My notes: Like I said this has already be written so I can't announce the winner of the request, so wait until the next.yes there will be another.I'm a little angry at real life right now..  
  
Bakura sat their staring in the mirror. He was listening to his Yami insult him and abuse him yet again. Just because he didn't have magic and cared about people was no excuse to call him weak, pathetic, and useless.  
  
He let his head drop and therefore didn't see the card do a little bounce walk across the floor from his desk to Bakura. He didn't notice it until the card had been put in his hand.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
He looked down and a slow smile spread across his face. The card winked at him and he nodded back. While his Yami was busy insulting him, the card did it's magic.  
  
Change of Heart!  
  
Yami Bakura was now in Bakura's body, while Bakura stood behind him with the ring around his neck and the card in his hand.  
  
The Yami was taken aback by the look on his light's face. It looked slightly evil, and why was half of him covered in shadows.  
  
"So, dear Yami. You think I'm pathetic and weak?"  
  
Yami B. blinked and wondered if his hearing was wrong or did Bakura actually sound like a girl?  
  
"Well, I'll show you how much power I have!"  
  
He lifted the card into Yami B.'s view and he knew what was going on. It was the card that was lashing out at him, but Bakura was helping it.  
  
Before he could think anymore, he found himself looking up at Bakura, way up.  
  
He was a mouse!!  
  
Bakura smirked at him and pointed. He looked and saw that his body was still upright, but he was squeaking. It was embarrassing and then his body spotted him and tackled him.  
  
It just had to be the mouse he had kept throwing around.  
  
He ran as fast as his legs could carry him as his body followed on hands and feet. He spared one glance at his Light/Card. To his further horror, it had a camcorder and was recording everything. Only anyone who saw it would see him running around on all fours, squeaking and chasing a mouse.  
  
He finally got refuge in a hole and watched as the mouse, tape still rolling, used his body to go and sit at Bakura's feet like an obedient puppy. After other such tricks, all for cheese, Bakura finally put away the recorder and the card glowed. Everyone was back in their own bodies and Bakura smirked into the mirror.  
  
"Be careful who you piss off Yami. My strength lies in the trust of the cards."  
  
His Yami was unusually quiet and Bakura laughed, before wondering how the card had done that. Oh well.it worked.  
  
My notes: Well....? 


	6. The end...Naw just the beginning

The End, Naw Just the beginning.  
  
My notes: This is a series I will add to whenever I need stress relief. I'm glad others like it, but I don't know when or how often I'll add more, just no that it will never be over.  
  
Joey stared at his friends as they all sat explaining the problems with the cards. It was over at Yugi's house and it seemed that him, Tristan and Mokuba seemed the only ones not affected. He took a sip of his drink, until he learned what had happened to Kaiba's pool, and sprayed it everywhere while trying not to laugh.  
  
They all turned to him. Yami spoke up.  
  
"Joey, why haven't you been affected. You're a dueler as well."  
  
"I guess they just haven't gotten around to me yet." Kaiba snorted.  
  
"You're the underdog of everything, including revenge." Joey pretended to glare but inside he was laughing. He made a show of looking at the clock and than looking at everyone around.  
  
"I have to go home, I'm expecting a call from Serenity and I don't want to miss it." They knew how much he cared about his sister and let him leave, still trying to figure out what could be going on with the cards.  
  
On his way home he stopped off in a store and picked up some unusual purchases.  
  
A violet crystal vase and a fancy drink in a glass bottle.  
  
A copy of Mercedes Lackey, Born To Run. (a book about elves who race cars and save kids in our world)  
  
Three packets of meat.  
  
A lock pick set and a manicure set. (the latter for uses that are yet to be known)  
  
A bunch of sweet candy.  
  
A black dress. A white dress.  
  
"I think that about covers it." He entered his home and ran up his stairs. There right on time was the person he was hoping for. "I think this is everything. Who do you think we should get next."  
  
The Flame Swordsman took the stuff and set it by an open laptop. "I don't much like that Pegasus guy and I know a lot of cards who weren't happy to be turned into toons."  
  
Joey sat in front of the laptop and grinned at the Warrior.  
  
"And everyone wonders why you're my favourite." He inserted a card into the laptop and started typing. The warrior looked over his shoulder a bit and grinned.  
  
"See you later and I'll take this stuff to their owners. I'll also find out what the other cards want as payment for the next one." Joey looked at him before he left.  
  
"It's a good thing you earn a lot of gold from our duels."  
  
The warrior smiled.  
  
"Wouldn't have it any other way."  
  
My notes: A short part to sort of explain everything, like I said before, this is stress relief and will updated according to how I feel. Hope you like it!! 


	7. Toon Wars!

Toon Wars!  
  
Me: Okay, I need to relieve some stress and since I'm not overly fond of Pegasus.grin..  
  
The loss still hurt, the pain kept him awake at night and therefore he had returned to his favourite hobby, watching cartoons. Ah, how he loved their antics and playful ways. Toonworld was the best card he had ever come up with. It made those horrid monsters into lovely toons.  
  
His eye pained him again and he sighed. It had hurt to lose it, but at least his normal eye had still been there. He was flipping through channels when a feeling of cold dread traveled down his spine. He looked around but there was no Tri-coloured hair boy with two minds or a white haired thief, so what had bothered him?  
  
He looked to his right and saw his dueling deck had been tossed about the room. Crying out he ran to his cards and picked up the first one, intent on fixing them. His intentions were cut short when he suddenly felt himself, shrink. He looked up and around and then at his card.  
  
Toonworld?  
  
It had activated.but how? Suddenly he remembered another part of this card's effect. He watched as the book came out and opened up, sucking him inside and trapping him with every card he had ever made a toon, and since that was every card in existence.  
  
He gulped. He may like toons, but he a distinct feeling that the cards did not. This feeling was confirmed when he saw the cards hone in on his presence and he was surrounded. He stared at them in horror, before a light bulb lit up.literally, since he was a toon after all.  
  
Because he was a toon, he couldn't be hurt, he grinned and sighed, how wonderful toons were. But then he saw the cards bring out mallets and remembered that other toons could hurt a fellow toon.  
  
They advanced on him and he wondered what was going to happen.  
  
Suddenly the Toon Blue-eyes White Dragon appeared over their heads and chuckled evilly at Pegasus.  
  
"You know," it said it a squeaky voice, "We didn't appreciate becoming these.things."  
  
"They are not things." out of nowhere an anvil appears and drops on Pegasus. The toons waited patiently for him to crawl out from under it. The toon Summoned Skull spoke next.  
  
"We are to just things! We are the joke of the Shadow Realm and it's your fault!"  
  
"But, I made you beautiful." A stick of dynamite gets thrown at him and he blows up. Pegasus is now completely black and coughing cloud of smoke. Again the toons are patient.  
  
"If you call this beautiful, you need a new pair of eyes."  
  
"I had one, thank you and." The toons sigh as a boulder is heard coming through the air, one hands Pegasus one of those little umbrellas, but as we all no, it does no good. He is crushed again and this time comes out all wobbly and sporting a major headache. The toons just watch wondering when he would realize that they didn't want him to speak.  
  
He opened his mouth again and they just screamed forget it! One by one they tackled Pegasus, he was hit by a mallet, electrocuted, burnt to a crisp, nearly drowned, crushed (several more times actually) and then finally the toons had enough of Pegasus's whining that they threw him out of the book.  
  
It was announced the next morning over TV 'that the Creator of Duel Monsters has destroyed the all-powerful Toonworld card. No one knows his reasoning and in other news..' Yugi Company knew this was great news but were wondering why Pegasus had gotten rid of his beloved card. Then they remembered their own experiences and shuddered. Okay cancel that question.  
  
Meanwhile, Joey was again shopping, this time for comic books, those toons were pretty demanding but it was worth it.  
  
He grinned.  
  
The Flame Swordsman appeared and whispered in his ear and then disappeared again. It seemed a certain commander wanted to talk to a should-be Dueler. He whistled as he left the shop. This should be fun. 


	8. Commando Style!

Commando Style!  
  
Tristan was wandering through the arcade thinking about the recent events. He was so glad he wasn't a Dueler.  
  
'And why is that?'  
  
Tristan started and looked around. No one seemed to be talking to him. He probably just heard someone else's conversation. He was in the new arcade after all. He continued walking, looking at all the different games.  
  
'I asked you a question boy and I demand an answer.'  
  
This time Tristan knew that someone was talking to him and he turned around. His jaw dropped as he came face to face with the Cyber Commander.  
  
"This can't be happening, I don't even Duel!"  
  
'Which is exactly the problem. Now listen to me boy and don't make any noise.' He cleared his throat. 'Supposedly I am your favourite card. But I don't get to do anything, because you don't learn how to duel properly!'  
  
"But."  
  
SLAM!  
  
The Cards gun had smashed into his head, but because of Tristan's hair, there was now a hole in the gun. Both looked at it and even though Tristan couldn't see completely straight yet, he knew he was in trouble.  
  
The commander growled and whatever he was going to say was forgotten. He chased after Tristan and no one stopped them thinking it was a promotion for the arcade.  
  
Tristan on the other hand was trying to get the angry card away from him. He turned a corner and found a food stand. He picked up the box of candies and through them at his pursers feet. The card tripped on them, but managed to grab Tristan and pull him down too.  
  
The wrestled and rolled, upending quite a few machines and creating a lot of damage. Finally the Card had Tristan pinned, but because he had lost his gun somewhere in the begging of the fight he was using a toy mallet from one of the games and was beating Tristan over the head repeatedly with it.  
  
What was being said now is censored for all the little viewers, older ones, I'm sure you can fill in the blanks.  
  
"..........!"  
  
'...!'  
  
'.....!'  
  
"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
'......"  
  
And so on and so on until the manager came and kicked them both out saying the words Tristan dreaded hearing.  
  
"YOU ARE FOREVER BANNED FROM THIS ARCADE!!!"  
  
Tristan stared after the manager and than looked around for the card. It was nowhere to be seen. But he did see Joey coming out of a store carrying what looked to be a bag full of boxers.  
  
He ran to his friend.  
  
"Joey, what are all those for?"  
  
Joey grinned and just replied,  
  
"I just know someone who is tired of going 'Commando Style'. By the way Tristan, why do you look like you've been through a war?"  
  
"Another Card came to life."  
  
"You don't say." 


	9. A Bug's Life...

A Bug's Life.  
  
Me: *blinks in shock* people are actually still reading this.and find it funny. Man, who knew stress relief could be so entertaining.  
  
Weevil stared at the paper and then promptly tore it to pieces. Bad enough that he got wiped out in his first battle in Duelist Kingdom, and that Yugi won first place and an amateur won second, but now the papers were reporting it and it was all over the news and rubbed in his face!  
  
"How dare they hurt my precious bugs. They are the ultimate and can't be beaten."  
  
'Speaking of that, we have been meaning to talk to you.'  
  
Weevil's head whipped around trying to find the source of the noise but all he saw was a little moth. No one else was even looking at him.  
  
"Now people are ignoring me because of one measly loss."  
  
'No, they are ignoring you because you are an arrogant bastard who prefers to talk more than duel. Speaking of which, from now on, shut up!'  
  
Now Weevil was truly mad!  
  
"How dare you-,"  
  
"Listen, kid if you're going to keep talking to yourself than do so away from the front of my store. You're scaring away the customers."  
  
Weevil glared at the man's retreating back and looked around for the unknown voice. But as the man had pointed out, he was yelling at empty air.  
  
'Well maybe this will help teach you a lesson. We were defeated because of you, and in one turn no less! All because you weren't paying attention. Do you know how embarrassing it was that all of us got sent to the graveyard at one time? While other monsters were calmly waiting for their companions?!'  
  
A bee landed on Weevil's neck and stung him, causing him to yelp in pain and step backwards causing him to upset a June bug which decided to go Kamikaze on him. He avoided the suicidal bug and smashed his head into a brick wall and dislodging a hornet's nest. He stared at in horror as the hornets swarmed after him and down the street, causing him to run into a little boy coming out of the pet store. A spider crawled out of the boy's upturned container and leaped at Weevil causing him to run screaming like a girl into another wall and becoming dizzy. He also broke his glasses which was why he couldn't see the caterpillar nest he had walked into. He screamed again and passed out.  
  
'That will teach you to embarrass us, also now we get those nice looking snacks from that blond kid.'  
  
The bugs returned to normal behavior as Weevil was taken to hospital.  
  
Joey laughed the next morning when he heard of the 'unfortunate retirement of a master Duelist.'. He tossed another treat to his friend and the Flame Swordsman just smiled.  
  
"So who should we do next?"  
  
"You do realize we have cards now waiting in line for a chance to go at their respective Duelers." Joey turned and looked at his friend in shock.  
  
"Seriously?" The warrior nodded. Joey grinned. "This is perfect. But one question. How come none of you guys have ever come after me?"  
  
"Simple. With no powers or other souls to help you, you were willing to learn and treat us with respect. That means a lot." He paused. "Plus, we're charging the cards for the fees of your writing ability."  
  
Joey laughed.  
  
"You know, we should do something so the others don't suspect anything."  
  
The swordsman smiled.  
  
"I have just the idea." 


	10. The Best Laid Plans

The Best Laid Plans.  
  
Me: yes I know I have been gone a long time, but I have been moving so you'll just have to bear with me while I get everything settled in.thanks for your patience, well from all the ones who haven't invaded my email that is.  
  
Joey glanced nervously around the room for the fourth time in the past minute. The warrior had said to be here and that he wouldn't come to harm, but he still wished he knew what was going to happen to him.  
  
He sighed and sat down, looking across the lake he was sitting beside. He couldn't figure out what his friend had in store and that bugged him.  
  
"Joey? Is that you? What are you doing out here?"  
  
Joey's head whipped around and he came face to face with Mai. She sat down beside him and he didn't know what to say to her. He had a long time crush for the lovely blond, not something he has ever admitted to anyone but Flame.Oh no!  
  
He groaned and looked through his deck quickly and knew exactly what card was missing. He wasn't going to be tortured by the cards, but he had a sinking feeling that Mai just might do the honors for them.  
  
He was about to warn Mai to leave when the little clock from hell (as he presently dubbed it) showed up and shouted the two words he did not want to hear.  
  
"Time Magic!"  
  
Both blonds were engulfed in the magic and sucked into the past, present and future. Joey watched in horror as they were taken back to the first meeting between the two and Mai could see his affection for her. He started sweating when she stayed silent watching a dream he had in the past and the feelings he had now.  
  
He was a nervous wreck when he saw a near future look at the two together and almost cracked when he saw their wedding. He was going to severely hurt a certain warrior when he got home, if he could still move-  
  
-Or breathe for that matter. He shut his eyes, not willing to watch any more and only knew it was over when he ended back by the lake. The silence was horrible, it hang heavy in the air and Joey dimly wished that the crickets would get with the program and start chirping; anything to fill the silence.  
  
Finally a hand reached down and tilted his head up. He looked into Mai's eyes and saw her smiling.  
  
"Next time, just tell me, okay?" Then she laughed, "Well at least we now know for sure that you aren't the one behind all this. You just went through hell." She kissed him softly on the cheek and then left, winking once.  
  
Meanwhile the Flame Swordsman held Harpie Lady close as they watched the scene. "About time," the winged one muttered. The warrior laughed and kissed his beloved good-bye before turning to his mortal friend.  
  
Joey looked up at the warrior's entrance and glared at him a few minutes before laughing. The warrior smiled, knowing he was forgiven.  
  
"Come on, let's go home, I'll give you some bandages for those claw marks on your face." He gave the warrior a knowing wink that caused his face to match his name. As they walked him, both were left wondering whom had gotten whom.  
  
Me: Weird yes I know, but I figured that Flame had to have a nice part in this as well. Next we are going to take a trip to a museum and then we shall see a different side of Yugi.. but knowing me, it won't stop there. At least this is better than counseling. 


	11. A Bone to Pick

A Bone to Pick.  
  
Me: No, this is not dead, it'll continue whenever I get stressed out.  
  
  
  
Joey stared at the computer. It had been months since any of the cards had 'expressed' themselves and he was bored. Everything had gone back to normal as far as his friends knew and he wanted to change that.  
  
Finally he typed up a short ad and left it with his deck. He knew that Flame would see that it got distributed.  
  
'Wanted: Fed up Card with a bone to pick. Must be willing to come into mortal realm. We supply means and compensation, you supply place and person.'  
  
The ad was answered before Joey got home. When he did, he saw his warrior sitting on his bed with a card.  
  
"Know any museums?"  
  
Joey grinned.  
  
Rex entered the museum and headed straight for the dinosaur exhibit. He was glad that someone had sent him the flyer announcing the opening day. Ever since he had lost the duel to that blond beginner, he hadn't been himself.  
  
Hopefully this would make him feel better.  
  
'Think again, human.'  
  
He looked around but he was the only one in the room.  
  
"Okay, I'm losing it."  
  
'You mean you've already lost it.'  
  
"Hey! Don't insult me!"  
  
'It's not an insult if it's the truth, I mean you are speaking to an empty room after all.'  
  
Rex looked around. The voice was right. Besides the dinosaur skeletons he was alone. He looked around some more and then something shifting behind him caught his attention. He spun around.  
  
"Hah! There is someone here-"  
  
His sentence trailed off as he watched the towering skeleton of the T-Rex seem to sprout another head. The two heads turned and looked down at the shocked human.  
  
'So I lied. You are not alone. Now then, we need to talk.'  
  
"But,"  
  
WHACK!  
  
A display case fell over from the impact of the skeletons tail hitting it. It narrowly avoided falling on Rex who decided that if he was hallucinating, he wanted to snap out of it really quickly.  
  
'I'll do all the talking.'  
  
'You mean we, don't you?'  
  
One head looked at the other. The first one nodded in apology.  
  
'Of course I meant that, my apologies. We are a set. Now then, we are quite pissed off at you. Just because we are dinosaurs does not mean that we can't think.'  
  
'You only use us as brute strength. You don't care for us.'  
  
"But you're just a card."  
  
As soon as the words left his mouth he knew it was the wrong thing to say. Both heads turned and stared at him and he could hear the growling even though his eyes told him it was impossible. The King had snapped.  
  
'First you insult us by letting us die to a bug!'  
  
'Then you use our beautiful cousin the Red eyed Black Dragon as a bargaining chip!'  
  
'Now you insult our very existence?'  
  
Rex ran, but you can't outrun a massive two-headed King Rex. He was whacked with the tail and got tossed into a display of smaller dinosaurs. These dinosaurs started to bite his ankles and when he kicked them he found out that they were 'baby' dinosaurs and mommy wasn't too happy. Mommy chased him around the exhibit hall, causing him to crash into another dinosaur and thus the cycle continued.  
  
The two heads were content to watch their mortal cousins, aided by a bit of magic, chase the human down. They weren't causing him any physical harm, although they wouldn't say the same for his mental state. When they felt he had gone through enough, and they had run out of the popcorn they were eating during the show they ate him whole. But being a skeleton, Rex just landed in the hollow of their rib cage.  
  
Needless to say security did not believe Rex when he tried to explain how the exhibit had been ruined and how he ended up inside the dinosaur, which once again had only one head.  
  
'And in other news, Dueler Rex Raptor was caught defacing a dinosaur exhibit in the museum. He announced today that he had quit dueling and is now booking himself into a nice padded room-'  
  
Yami reached over and turned off the radio.  
  
"I guess things aren't quite over yet."  
  
The pharaoh looked around.  
  
"Where's Joey?"  
  
"Probably with Mai. He was the only one the cards actually helped out."  
  
"While embarrassing him completely."  
  
The friends looked at each other. Finally Seto spoke.  
  
"Our list of suspects is slowly growing smaller. Anyone willing to change their bets?"  
  
A round of hands went up and new bets were laid.  
  
Meanwhile Mai was with Joey who had gone grocery shopping.  
  
"Joey. Why do you need all this meat?"  
  
"Extinction will cause a person to go hungry."  
  
"Did you say exhaustion?"  
  
"Yep. Why? What'd you think I said?"  
  
"Nothing."  
  
Me: Mindless, pointless and so much fun to do! Sorry if people were left waiting. 


	12. Dox Para?

Dox Para?  
  
Flame Swordsman had gotten a request. One he was very happy to bring to Joey's attention and together they began a fitting revenge.  
  
Para and Dox sat in their maze and went through their cards. They were still famous eliminators and needed to make sure their decks were in the best possible shape.  
  
"We are the best,"  
  
"There is no doubt."  
  
"We'll beat all."  
  
"And win every bout."  
  
'You know that can get very annoying.'  
  
They both looked around and saw no one else.  
  
"Did you hear what I heard?"  
  
"I'd say yes, but that's absurd."  
  
'Knock it off already!'  
  
Before the brother's very eyes a figure emerged from their cards. The three parts of the Gate Guardian stood there, looking very annoyed. They had a right to be, look whom they belonged to. They all agreed that that was the only reason they needed to get back at these two.  
  
'Do you have any idea how much we are ridiculed because of you two?'  
  
'I actually enjoyed being used by that Yugi kid.'  
  
'Any idea what that says about you two?'  
  
"We are the best,"  
  
"At what we do."  
  
"We are the ones."  
  
"Who command you."  
  
The three raised their eyebrows.  
  
'Oh really?' They chorused and as one they cast a spell on the brothers and disappeared back into there cards.  
  
The brothers looked at each other and shrugged. Nothing had happened.  
  
"In our mind."  
  
"We made them,"  
  
"Of any kind."  
  
"No spell they cast,"  
  
They were about to turn back to their work when they thought about what they had just said.  
  
"This cannot be."  
  
"No,"  
  
"And I speak not for me."  
  
"You speak my words,"  
  
They realized what had been done. Everything they should speak the other brother spoke but in the wrong order. They tried to correct it, but every sentence turned out backwards. The added problem to this what they had no other way of communicating in a duel any more because not only did they confuse their opponents, they drove themselves insane at the same time.  
  
"Longer duel."  
  
"We can no longer,"  
  
"That is to cruel."  
  
"This is a fate,"  
  
They sighed and after that they never spoke again.  
  
  
  
Seto brought to the attention of the others an article over the Internet. It seemed that the Paradox brothers were no longer available in the eliminator service.  
  
"I wonder what made them quit?"  
  
"I don't know Yugi, but don't question this good fortune, it seems they will no longer speak to anyone either."  
  
"That's a relief."  
  
"You said it Tea."  
  
Meanwhile Joey was looking through the mall for a tent that could stand three conflicting elements.  
  
"Why they want to go camping together is beyond me."  
  
He sighed and continued to search.  
  
  
  
Me: I had to, their episode was on today and it drove me insane, and now I drove them insane. Okay, I'm happy now. 


	13. Cute and Cuddly?

Cute and Cuddly?  
  
My Notes: Miss me? Of course you did ^^ Told you it would never end.  
  
Rebecca was looking through the cards her Grandfather had given her and pouted. He had refused to buy her any new cards until she fully understood what Yugi had taught her.  
  
"But he didn't teach me anything, right Teddy?" She asked the ever-present stuffed toy, not expecting an answer from it.  
  
So you can probably picture her face when it looked up at her and grinned? She gulped, sure that toys weren't suppose to do that, nor were they suppose to be glowing slightly and holding the Shadow Ghoul card either. But it was.  
  
'He taught you a lot, but you, being the spoiled little brat that you are, just didn't get a clue! What a pathetic child you are. You don't deserve me or to be able to duel.'  
  
"Hey! How dare-"  
  
The teddy lunged at her and she backed away quickly.  
  
'How about we play a little game, Mr. Teddy would like that too.' And with that he started a game of 'tag' well basically he chased her through the house, popping out of shadows and scaring the girl senseless in the process, dumping paint on her and turning everything everywhere bright pink.  
  
When he finally disappeared back into his card she was left with a huge mess and a maid who was yelling at her to clean everything up and to stop blaming everything on 'Teddy' who was probably fed up with being used.  
  
When her Grandfather came home he was surprised to see that her cards had been duct-taped together and that her beloved 'Teddy' was locked in the birdcage.  
  
He decided not to ask as she was muttering something about possessed toys and never dueling again. At least she was no longer whining about cards or about anything at all really.  
  
He thought he could get use to this.  
  
The gang was over at Yugi's when Grandpa got the call from his friend about Rebecca. They all looked at each other and Seto grabbed a notebook out of his pocket and scratched out another name.  
  
He looked around.  
  
"New bets?" They all nodded and Joey grinned knowing Flame was at home delivering the payment to Shadow. It would figure he would want the movie 'Pitch Black'.  
  
My Notes: Maybe not as funny as the other ones, but I really didn't want to hurt her, she is just a kid (spoiled rotten) after all. Next, YUGI! ^^;;; 


End file.
